January 2020 Articles

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Spiritual Corner: The Complication of Caring Too Much or Too Little

Spiritual Corner: The Complication of Caring Too Much or Too Little

I fully believe that there are times where we need to not worry so much about what others think about us. I, for one, tend to be the world’s worst about being so self-conscious over what someone else thinks about me. I sometimes allow this to give me such anxiety that it can be unhealthy. I allow fear to overcome me, instead of not worrying about what they think and just trusting God. On the flip side, I think that a big portion of society has the opposite problem that I do—they truly don’t care enough about what others think. There seems to be a steady group of people who basically say that they’ll do what they want, only God can judge them, and they don’t care what anyone else says. There also seems to be individuals who strongly believe in something and don’t care who they may happen to offend—commenting on how some people are too sensitive or are “snowflakes”. I think there is a fine line between caring too much about what others think about you and not caring enough. The truth is, God didn’t put us here on earth to only worry about ourselves. God calls us to love Him, first and foremost, but then to love others, as we love ourselves (Matthew 22:37-39). This attitude of not caring what others think about something or not caring who we might offend is not really caring about others. In Romans 12:18 it says, “If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men”. God wants us to live at peace with others if we can. This doesn’t mean that we have to believe what others believe if it is contrary to the Word of God, but it also doesn’t mean we should be rude to others or disrespectful of their opinions or beliefs. Someone who believes something that we may think is absolutely crazy, may be looking at the situation in a completely different way. For example, there could be an individual who is pro-choice concerning abortion. I, myself, am pro-life. However, I should not bash this person who is pro-choice. What if the reason that they are pro-choice is because they had a 13-year-old student who was raped and became pregnant? They may be looking at the abortion situation in light of that poor, young girl who had no choice in the matter of becoming pregnant and who was most likely terrified and confused because her body was barely even capable of conceiving. You see, there are other situations, outside our belief systems, that we sometimes need to consider. I’m not saying you should change your stance on abortion because of that incident, but I think you should strive to “live peaceably with all men” and civilly discuss your disagreements and sometimes simply agree to disagree. In Romans 14:12-21, it talks about how we will all give account before God and how we don’t need to do anything that would or could cause our brothers to stumble or that would offend them. For example, let’s say you had some circumstances where you were around some Native American people. Growing up, you had always heard them referred to as “Indians” and that’s what you had always called them. You didn’t ever mean anything racist or negative by it, but recently you’d heard that many of them did not like being called “Indians”. You might have the urge to say, “Well, I don’t really care what they think. I don’t mean anything negative by calling them “Indians”. They need to stop reading into things so much.” Instead of having this behavior, we should strive to do what God commanded and love others and try not to offend them. What does it really matter to you if you have to use the term “Native American” instead of “Indian”? It doesn’t affect you at all, but it might make someone else feel more comfortable and accepted. You see, sometimes when we have this attitude of “I don’t care what they think, I don’t mean anything bad by this, and I’m going to continue to speak or do how I’ve always done”, we are actually being somewhat selfish and prideful, and not allowing God to work through us to show love and compassion to others. I do not mean to judge anyone through writing this article. I have plenty of things that I struggle with and I definitely can get in the mindset of caring too much about what others think and not caring what others think as well. I have so many ways that I need to improve. This topic jumped out to me while I have been reading Romans, though. It seems to be something I see more and more and I thought, even though it may be a little controversial and step on some toes, that it was a topic that is very prevalent to our society today and that we all can get caught up in—sometimes without even realizing it. I want to trust God and not care so much about what others think of me, but I also want to love others and truly care what they think of me concerning my speech and actions. It can be messy at times, but loving God and loving others sometimes is. We have to truly let go of ourselves in these situations and let God radiate through us. --Dana Alexander